by Shelley Poston It can be difficult to be clear-headed in a dating relationship.
It is easy to see only the positive in the other person and completely ignore any warning signs. It would be foolish to date someone and not even consider the possible outcomes.
Christ’s role and a husband’s role do differ because only Christ alone can truly cleanse us.While you do not want that to happen, it is reality. Also, if he wants you to meet all his needs, that is close to idolatry (Exodus 20:3, 4). Do not fall for the statement of, “I just care about you so much,” when a guy won’t keep his hands to himself.You will disappoint each other, not on purpose, but you will. The truth is, he cares more about himself in that scenario.Spouse abuse by an angry man does not usually randomly begin fifteen years into a marriage. Abuse is not only physical- it can also be emotional. If he is more concerned with worldly pleasure than pleasing God in being an honorable and responsible man, this is not the kind of man who will rightly point his family toward Christ-likeness. The Bible has a name for the guy who has the Peter-Pan syndrome: he is called “the sluggard.” Proverbs mentions him several times, including in Proverbs 6:9-11, which states, “How long will you lie there, O sluggard? A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest, and poverty will come upon you like a robber, and want like an armed man.” What is this man’s work ethic? Is he unhealthily dependent on his friends or family?A man may apologize to you over and over again, but if he has abused you even once, leave the dating relationship immediately. Encourage him to find a godly man who can help him, but you should get out fast. Has he not taken adult responsibility such as his living arrangements or expenses? If your date is a flirt or has many close female friends (especially previous girlfriends), this is something to take as a caution.