I so badly didn’t want to care if he was about to reject me, but every breath became a prayer. The next day, an hour before we were meant to meet for drinks, as I was about to leave the office to quickly change out of my suit, I mean, at least, he didn’t need to wash his hair, but the pain still ripped right through me. And, by now, I finally had pictures of myself that depicted my entire chair from having professional photographs taken after I won Ms. if someone didn’t want to be my friend because of my disability, I certainly didn’t want to be theirs.
Three weeks ago though, I agreed to just use a dating app to make friends. The first great thing Tinder offered the other sites hadn’t was that only those who mutually liked each other could communicate.
He was an investment banker on Wall Street, and I was working as a lawyer in the financial district. We chatted for a bit before I had to head to bed before a long day in court the following day.
We hit it off straight away and after a few chats and a short call, we set up a time to meet.He asked if he could at least keep in touch through email and maybe we could meet up for drinks after work one day. He and I exchanged emails and chats back and forth for a few days, and he kept telling me how perfect he thought I was and how desperate he was to meet me and firmed up a meeting.I felt very uneasy about this knowing he likely never noticed the type of chair surrounding my upper body. At least in water boarding, one can hold her breath.I was not only incapable of socializing, which for an extrovert is torture.But, worse, as an intellectual, it was devastating and mind-numbing to have no one, with whom you can have an intelligent conversation or debate.